All that and a croissant

"This is just coffee," she said.
"Pardon?"
"What we're doing. We're only having a cup of coffee together."
"I thought I'd have a croissant too, but I understand what you mean. Yes, just coffee."
"I just want to be clear."
"And you've succeeded admirably," he said.
"I mean, I'm not...I should let you know that I'm not, well, not available for any sort of romantic, uh, entanglement."
"Okay. Fortunately, this is just a short term caffeine entanglement. Are you saying you're married? Or involved with somebody?"
"No, no, it's just...I don't know why I agreed to do this. I'm really not very good at this sort of thing."
"I can see that. You probably just need practice."
"Why did you ask me to coffee?"
"I like your earrings."
"What?"
"I like your earrings. And your book selection. Look, I see you at the library two, three times a month. In the fiction section, in history, in the bios, in the reference department. You check out interesting books. And you wear interesting dangly earrings. So I thought you'd be an interesting person to talk to. Over coffee."
"I'm not."
"Oh?"
"Well, I am. Usually. I think. Just not right now. You must think I'm nuts, acting like this. Blathering."
"Not yet. But then, this is the first time we've spoken. I've never seen you act any other way. How do you normally act?"
"Different. You're very sure of yourself, aren't you."
"I am right now. It's easier to be sure of yourself when it's the other person who's blathering. Had you asked me to coffee, I'd be the one blathering now."
"I wouldn't have asked you to coffee."
"Oh."
"I didn't mean it like that. Don't look so deflated. I just meant I wouldn't have had the nerve."
"Ah. Maybe if I wore dangly earrings?"
"Maybe. Here comes your croissant. I love a croissant, but there's something about the shape that seems rather larval."
"Larval."
"Oh dear, that's not a very appetizing image, is it."
"Not for a human."
"I told you I wasn't very good at this."
"You're getting better. And you're eyeing my larval croissant. Would you like a taste?"
"I would, actually, but it seemed forward to ask."
"Am I such an imposing figure?"
"No. You're not at all imposing."
"Oh."
"No, no, I meant...."
"I'm sorry, I know what you meant. I was just trying to get you to smile."
"Then maybe you should try wearing dangly earrings."
"If I did, would you ask me for coffee?"
"What are you expecting from this? From asking me for coffee."
"I don't know. Pleasant conversation. A chance to make a new friend. An interesting diversion for an hour, before I go back home and do last night's dishes."
"All that?"
"All that and a croissant. What are my chances?"
"Well, I've already eaten half your croissant. We'll see about the rest."

posted by greg @ 10:40 AM